You Don’t Have to ‘Earn’ Your Thanksgiving Dinner: Letting Go of Food Guilt
The Lie of “Earning” Your Food
You’ve probably heard it before:
“I’m saving up for Thanksgiving dinner.”
“I’ll have to work this off tomorrow.”
“I’ve been so bad today.”
These phrases sound harmless, but they carry a painful message: that your worth (and your right to eat) depends on what you’ve consumed or how much you’ve exercised.
The truth is simple: you never need to earn your food.
Your body needs and deserves nourishment every single day, no matter what’s on your plate or how much movement you’ve done.
Why Food Guilt Is So Hard to Shake
Food guilt is often learned early. Diet culture teaches us to moralize food. to label it as “good” or “bad,” “clean” or “junk.” Over time, those labels turn inward, and we start labeling ourselves the same way.
Example:
“I ate dessert” becomes “I was bad today.”
“I skipped the gym” becomes “I have no discipline.”
But guilt doesn’t create lasting change. It just disconnects you from your body’s natural cues and reinforces the belief that you can’t be trusted.
Healing from food guilt means learning to approach eating from curiosity and care. not control or punishment.
What Happens When You Stop “Earning” Food
When you stop restricting before big meals, stop overcompensating after, and start feeding yourself regularly, your body begins to trust you again.
You stop entering every celebration starving and panicked around food. You start to experience eating as connection, satisfaction, and comfort. not chaos or shame.
Therapist framing: Consistent nourishment is one of the most compassionate things you can do for your nervous system. Your body isn’t asking for perfection it’s asking for predictability and care.
3 Steps to Let Go of Food Guilt This Thanksgiving
Eat Consistently, Even on Holiday Mornings
Skipping breakfast to “save up” for dinner only leads to intense hunger, dysregulation, and overeating later. Your body doesn’t know it’s a holiday; it still needs energy throughout the day.
Try having a balanced breakfast and snack before your meal. You’ll arrive grounded and better able to notice satisfaction.
2. Challenge “Good” and “Bad” Food Labels
When guilt creeps in, gently remind yourself: “All foods fit.”
Each food, from turkey and mashed potatoes to pie, offers something valuable: nourishment, pleasure, tradition, or connection. You’re allowed to enjoy all of it.
3. Focus on Connection, Not Calories
Notice the moments that truly matter, including laughter, warmth, gratitude, the smell of your favorite dish. These are the experiences that stay with you far longer than any calorie count.
Therapist tip: If you start to feel anxious, take a deep breath and ask, “What do I want to remember from today?” That simple question can bring you back to your values instead of your fears.
Reframing Movement as Care, Not Compensation
If you enjoy moving your body (and it’s safe for you to move), wonderful, but let it come from a place of connection, not debt.
You don’t need to “burn off” your meal. You can move because it feels good, because it helps you feel strong, because it supports your wellbeing.
Movement is most healing when it’s an act of care, not control.
Gratitude for Your Body, Not Punishment for It
As you gather around the table, try offering gratitude for what your body allows you to experience: taste, laughter, hugs, and belonging.
Your body isn’t a problem to solve, it’s the reason you get to participate in this moment.
You don’t have to earn your food, your rest, or your joy. You were worthy of all three the moment you were born.
Ready to Keep Healing Beyond the Holidays?
Download my free guide, 5 Day Food Freedom Kickstarter, to start unlearning diet culture and building a peaceful relationship with food — not just during the holidays, but year-round.
Contact Me if you’re ready to set up a free 15 minute consultation to see if we would be a good fit to work together.